Being out with Wyrr today was really fun and it was great to spend time with Dad again tonight, but fuck, I am exhausted now. Sleep is happening in about fifteen minutes.

Got a 6 for Project. Woooooo. I'm totally happy with this; I wrote terribly all semester. This gives me hope for when I am actually happy with things.

Just read 'Verdana' as 'Ver Istenna' so I'm no longer quite in my right mind, but I'm not finished yet, so I can't really go to bed. This would have been a lot smoother without the second-person discussion. I lost a few hours over that one because I was so damn agitated. I'd have played a game for a little while, ordinarily, just to blow off steam, but of course mum and Chris were around the television. Heaven forfend that I use it twice in the same week.

(Seriously. Twenty minutes for a grand prix is not that big an ask.)

Anyway. Off I go. Still writing. Oh, Louis, Louis. Still whining, Louis.

This song should not be so fucking perfect for Rook and Thom asdhjfjasdfjads whyyyyyyyfjsdfhasjdfhsjdfsfashsda sj.

This entire FST should not be so good for Rook and Thom. It should not be so goddamn good to WRITE TO when none of the songs apply to what I'm writing at ALL.

( TRACKLIST. )

FFFdsjfhajsdhfjashdfjasdhfjffffffffffffffffffffff. ♥ ♥ ♥

After this week, I am porning Rook and Thom so hard. SO HARD. LIKE A TRUCK, BERSERRRKERRR.

THAT IS ALL.

(I may be going slightly mad.)

[EDIT]

Right. The good news is, I have 6100 words. The bad news is, I'm not finished this scene yet, and also I cannot fit Scene By a Brook in this. No faerie UST for Craig. I'm sure he'll be so disappointed. Finishing this before bed, and then tomorrow I can:
- get up at 7.30 This was before I stayed up until 1.30 trying to round off what I had.
- scan everything
- upload everything scanned
- burn everything that isn't printed
- edit this quickly again
- email everything to Craig
- run away to assignment minder with the printed copy
- dance and rejoice for many moons
- make kanji cards
- continue to dance and rejoice, for I will have one thing left and that thing will be a reading/writing exam, which I am good at

Sometimes when I feel like I can't write anything I go back over my notes to rediscover inspiration. With AtM, this means I discover things like the following.

BAN: It's good to see you both again. Are you wearing his pants?
HIRU: ...........
HIRU: ...........
HIRU: ......No.


One day I am actually going to get Sanga angry and write the suffocation scene properly, I swear it. ONE DAY. I just need to spend, like, two weeks riling Sanga and writing absolutely no porn at all and provoking Hiru into saying stupid things which Sanga will receive entirely without context and then MAYBE IT WILL HAPPEN LIKE IT'S SUPPOSED TO.

Still not finished, because I fail at life. Maybe after dinner.

[EDIT] Having gotten further, and not feeling like tagging another entry with practically the same thing...

TOL: *breaks the glamour*
SKEFF: OW OW OW FUCK OW
TOL: *punched in the stomach*
SKEFF: YOU FUCKER. THANKS A LOT.
TOL: *wheeze*
SKEFF: OH MY GOD I AM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU. *CHOKESOB*
TOL: *hugstrangled*
ME: You are the most useless protagonist in the history of the world. I should have written you in second person and named you 'Doormat'.
TOL: :( </3

Or a person with a taser at least. -_- SOMEONE MAKE ME WRITE SOMETHING USEFUL. I keep sitting down, not really wanting to do anything, and just... frittering away the time. I CANNOT AFFORD TO FRITTER AWAY THE TIME.

Slept really badly. Turned off alarm at half-seven and tried to sleep a little more, and had a dream about Richard III sending people to guard the tower because he thought there was a monster inside. There was fuckall in the tower, so obviously it was his guilt!crazy speaking, and that's cool. But. What the fuck. If I'm going to have dreams related to Shakespeare I would like to have dreams related to Rosencrantz if it is all the same to everyone else. Christ.

My other dream during this time was about cleaning up bodily fluids. I am not sure what to think of this. :|

Going to write a little before I get up properly - hopefully going to write a lot before I get up properly, because then I can print this out and leave it alone while I scan my critiques before I go back to editing it.

I wish my stomach would stop being a dick, and that the air conditioning did not make me feel dry, dry, dry. I should get some kind of humidifier. Or air conditioners should not dehumidify quite so much. This is another reason I hate summer.

[EDIT] This a-capella tribute to John Williams also says everything you ever need to know about Star Wars and now I want to watch the goddamn thing again. XDDD

• feather_qwill: you can change your layout if you create a whole new layer, like you did when you brought in Flexible Squares. Then go paste in your CSS as usual - the problem is probably that the system hasn't stored the layout source code where it's meant to be stored for easy editing. Whether this is because of IJ's random deletion (so until random deletion sets in, editing is easy) or because of bad design (so editing is impossible) I cannot tell. [EDIT]Looks like it's the former, which is encouraging.[/EDIT]
• Samurai!verse is, in fact, set in the vampire state. Which is part of AtM!verse. Which means that Malus gets a katana. Ohhhhyeah. Sweet, sweet Vampirese steel, forged with the bones of loyal human servants or something. I don't even know what I'm saying but it works in my head.
• Whenever I am going well with writing anything, I blog about going well until I have well and truly interrupted my own flow and can no longer write well at all.
• I really like blues and greys. No wonder I am so fond of school uniforms.

[EDIT] It's true. I write best between 4pm and dinnertime; then from 11pm until sleep overcomes me. The hours in between are spent procrastinating on the writing itself and considering what else I could be doing were I only finished writing.... then doing those things anyway. It's ludicrous. I would be more disciplined about NaNo. :( I'm sort of running out of university-applicable discipline.

I got to 1500 words, please do not show Sarah my awful awful Felix and Mildmay sketches oh god oh god oh god oh god. ;_;

Right. Have a little over 4k that I am reasonably happy with for Project; want to get to 4.5k before the end of the night because kuchibue has threatened to show my unfinished Felix and Mildmay drawings to Sarah Monette if I don't and the thought makes me want to vomit because that will make my life significantly easier.

Also want to read part of these novels for the exam before bed, but ahahahahaha, that is so not happening. *sob*

Going to DRAW now. Not going to write again until AT LEAST NINE. Oh god drawing *sob* happiness is mine *sob snivel choke* I don't even know where my sketchbook IS.

BURN WITH THE SPIRIT OF KINDNESS AND COURTESY, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Hello, yes, my name is STIR CRAZY.

I can't work on something over and over again for six months. I get bored. That is all I feel about this novel right now. Bored, bored, bored. Do you know why? BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THESE SAME SEVEN SCENES FOR SEVEN MONTHS AND IT IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.

So basically, feel like crying. Music playing did not help; gaming did not help; drawing feels like a waste of time today, too.

Translation: Hiru! My baby! Come to me! Just as soon as I have done All These Other Things, okay? Just lie down there, have a drink, get comfortable...

(In hindsight, linking sex with writing via metaphor is not as excellent an idea when the character you're writing is your baby, and revolted by women.)

In other news, it is thirty degrees today. FUCK OFF, NOVEMBER. D:

Oh my god, I totally forgot that the yuri special from SSBB came out today! X3 I has an excitement. Now you all know what I'm reading when I get the chance.

Also, I have no way of getting to David's party, which distresses me. It's basically just across the river, so it's not hard, but... *researches* It's two buses and a bit of walking. The real question, I suppose, is whether I wear my costume on the bus. (And the answer is: NO. Not when I have no one to costume with. XD *will dump it all in a bag and work it out when she gets there*)

It is already stupidly hot today, a fact which can Fuck Right Off as far as I'm concerned. We're hitting thirty a few times in the next week, and... no. :( Just no. I forgot that "First Day of NaNo" also meant "One Day 'til Official Summer" and.... *cry* No. It's a shame I can't go to Canada over Christmas while it's stupidly hot here.

(Ahhh, the best way to start my day: another review of F&F that says nothing but WHY'D YOU STOP? *facemash* Read my profile, fanbrat.)

To Do Today:
- shower
- breakfast
- clean kitchen
- clean room
- hang out clothes
- organise costume
- write project
- write nano
- work out how to get back from David's party
- get ready for David's party
- get to David's party
- get back from David's party
- sleep

Tony Stark is Reeve Tuesti, if Reeve lived in a superhero-friendly universe and were not into obscure folklore. Discuss.

(I bought Iron Man today and I am going to watch it now and NO MAN OR WOMAN, NO FAE OR ASSIGNMENT, IS GOING TO STOP ME.

Uni was one class in the morning, one class in the night, and a gatecrashing of kessira's Jap class in the middle. Also, I love Derringer/Leslie, and believe Leslie should carry through on his gag threats. I also very much love Richard and Cale. In fact, I probably shouldn't be allowed to read webcomics, because look at me babbling like this when I could be watching Iron Man.

Also, I got that Project extension. Thank fuck.)

workin the kinks out of my neck with heat pack has resulted in blurry weirdovision so woooooo this is going to be really great for my typing apilty. with any luck this is at all legible and you will know why I am staying away from gchat aside from the fact tht raphaeislington is being a complete and utter whoreslutbitchkitty and shutting down word ebery five minutes. wWHAT GIVES. just part and parcel of the assessment fandango, i suppose.

I'm awake. I'm not taking a shower until I have 3000 words. I MAY NOT SHOWER TODAY. But at least I am trying.

I know I had a dream this morning in the nghneedsmoar stage of dozing after my requisite three hours of sleep, but I cannot for the life of me remember what that dream was. I suspect it was vaguely reminiscent of a video game, and I suspect it was vaguely reminiscent of a horror video game, but I forgot the details halfway across the room to turn off the alarm clock.

I miss dreaming. I really don't do it very often. It probably has something to do with the lack of decent sleep. |D; I haven't dreamed since... probably around my last year of high school. Somewhere around there, I just... stopped. I used to dream vividly very regularly before that.

On the bright side, ciceqi's music collection has me caring about FF7 and writing for it again, so I am nearly ready to jump on the NaNo train except for the imminent fail.

I am 21 in one week. I thought I'd note it now, since I probably won't be thinking about it on the day. XD Except... hm. I need to make room for my Sheik statuette. Maybe beside my bed, hurr hurr hurr. ♥

[EDIT] aaaaaaaaaand three minutes into this, there is stabbing pain up the side of my neck, which makes its home just below my right ear and may be trying to pretend it is a tension headache. HA. AHAHA. I AM NOT FOOLED.

No wait, I remember my dream, now. Shrek was distantly involved (or at least, I remember going on quests with the donkey) and leviathanmirror's stripper!verse was involved. XD Yuuko-san found me a pretty dress, but I had to go on an epic quest of some kind to locate it. (See, there was no need to worry; my dreams are still as fucking weird as they've always been.)

My neck huuuuuuurts.

;_;

[/whine]



[EDIT]

Tired and cranky and kind of not wanting to work on anything ever again, despite being reasonably happy with what I have. Which is like... maybe 18% of what has to be done by tomorrow night. I've only been working on that eighteen percent for like four weeks now, so I can totally manage this.

It is taking a great deal of self-control not to just lower my head and charge suicidally at a brick wall.

Well, a great deal of self control and the knowledge that I will have to actually go hunt down a brick wall to do it. -_-

In summary: blaaaaaargh. When not even tea and crackpairings can perk me up, you know there is a problem.

[EDIT] In case anyone is wondering, this in the back of my head is what makes working on this damn assignment so fucking difficult. XD Now that I am done drawing Xolotl's epic retardery, I think I can get back to work.

I am so far beyond fucked for Project it is not even funny. Everything I write these days feels dead. Which kind of makes me want to die.

And someone needs to remind me tomorrow to tell Megan that I can't work on the seventh, because I have an exam in the morning.

The sad part is when you can say, "My muse needs a holiday, and NaNoWriMo is it!" and mean it.

I cannot believe how exhausting this semester has been. It's just been one massive heap of crap after another. I can write three novel thingies at the same time, but novels + essays + presentations + vocab in other languages? Fuck off.

I am going to bed now, and I'm going to leave my blinds open so that I will wake up naturally. Then I will write by hand because this is hurting me. Hopefully I will become so absorbed that I actually forget I have other things to do.

[EDIT] read a little bit of neil gaiman's graveyard book and now i am wide awake and squealing because oh, oh neil. your characters. they make me weep gleefully into my hands.

Silas. I want to cuddle him. A lot.

Oh, Neil. <3 <3 <3

1) Only one person in my crit group showed up today. :(

2) I miss writing D/Vesca way more than anyone should really miss writing characters who only show up for five chapters of a manga series.

3) Five minutes after saying that he preferred analogue to digital, D went out and bought a computer. Because Wu Fei's lackey told him he woud be able to order exotic sweets over the internet.

Petshop of Horrors: THE AWESOMEST.

4) I get kessira in my crit group for line edits! WOO HOO! (My psychic powers consisted of eyeballing Craig and waving the appropriate number over her head when he went around numbering us for groups. XD I think he was a little unnerved.)

5) I have been so busy that I haven't even finished reading Shin Petshop v6 yet. it arrived eight hours ago.

6) I realised on the way home that I am now equipped to cosplay not Count D, but Nue Ehr, and nearly had a laughing fit on the bus. I can has be psycho sister nao? 8DDDD I would play the part so well...

7) So, who wants to be my da geh?

[EDIT] 8) I NEED CORAMBIS MORE THAN I NEED TO KEEP BREATHING.

9) I cannot write Mildmay. BUT IT IS GREAT FUN NONETHELESS.

( Today was one long ffffffffff, briefly interrupted by dresses and divide by cucumber errors. )

[EDIT] Squeaks, for a character made entirely of ass and sex appeal, Ambrose is surprisingly difficult to draw in a dress. XD It might help if I draw him normally first.